Everybody cries

Today it finally happened. I’d avoided it with great resolve. In fact I was rather pleased with my self. I’d been confronted by a mob of teenagers. Followed by strange men. Been rained on constantly. Been in constant pain. But today despite the sunshine and day rest I cried.

I didn’t want to cry. I’d been avoiding for this last week. Adamant that I was stronger than this. Adamant that for once I wasn’t going to be that person. Turns out I am that person.

If you know me well you’d know I hate confrontation, I can’t take criticism (I’m my own worst enemy on this one) and I cry all the time.

If you don’t know me well. Then I’ve been told I come across as rude, abrupt, stuck up, stand offish. The list goes on and I’m sure you get the idea. Something I’m working on though if you tell me this I’ll probably cry.

Today I was the person that cried. Walking along a beach. And then sitting on a beach. And then walking along a beach again. I had been so sure I wasn’t going to cry. Made sure I didn’t so many times. Stiff upper lip and get on with it stuff because crying doesn’t solve anything. Crying doesn’t help you walk that last 10km. You just get wet and snotty.

So I sat on my bag on the beach and I had a cry. And do you know what I didn’t feel any better. Not an ounce. I just looked ridiculous. My foot still really hurt and I still had 10km to walk. So I got up and I walked again. Every single step was agony. But here I am sat at Penmon point. I’ve made dinner and I’ve got a cup of tea. Now all I need is to walk a bit further to find somewhere to camp. Which I’m sure will also be agony.

The problem now is when is too much pain too much. I’m starting to get a bit concerned that A) my feet are more tape than feet and B) every step is excruciating pain. It’s pretty early on in the game to be in this much pain. I was told the first 5-10 days are the worst but I’m pretty sure they didn’t mean this bad. I guess I’ll just have to wait and see…

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